tight jeans - june 21, 2021
Yes you did, Pepe. Yes you DID. (Be Soccer)
If you don’t watch Portugal play very often you probably don't see a lot of Pepe. Every tournament he resurfaces with that piss-boiling brand of diving, card-baiting and finger-waving that has made him such rewarding television-shouting-at value down the years. On the rare occasions when I have to argue with hockey or helmet football fans about soccer players flopping around on the ground for no good reason I’m invariably shown a video of Pepe. And when this happens there is no argument: he really is a wonderful player.
Sweden are a snooze.
Sweden are a snooze
Choosing to watch Sweden play in this tournament is like going to see your pal’s band even though you know they do a really long cover of Pearl Jam’s ‘Black’ in the middle of their set.
The Swedes took the same negative approach to Slovakia as they did to Spain, despite the former being the worst team in their group by nearly all measures. The Jeaner is all-in on a good siege mentality now and then, but sitting deep against a team that sits deep themselves, and generating less scoring chances than you did against fucking SPAIN, feels like a poor return. A 1-0 win on a penalty is still a win, but how Sweden is top of its group after two games remains a puzzle.
Strongly Encouraged: Raheem Sterling
It’s worth clicking on this link for a wonderful example of the feelings of acute betrayal and malaise that go hand in hand with supporting England in a major tournament. The clip is worth its weight in gold. And even as it takes on Raheem's Sterling's maddening ball management in the opponent's final third, it's worth remembering that he’s scored England’s only goal in the tournament so far.
Centre it to Bale. Chances that this song was playing? Slim, we know. (Burak Akbulut via Getty Images)
This image is mint: Gareth B(W)ale(s)
Gareth Bale wants it this tournament. Look at him giving it the Friday Night Lights on a Wednesday night in Baku to the entire Welsh team and coaching staff- all of them just fucking roaring. It’s fantastic.
Man, this Euros shit is fun.