Darby Jean #97 | You're such a Conte

Nuno Espirito Santo is done as Tottenham Hotspur manager.

His four-month stint lasted seventeen games, across which the club posted nine wins, seven losses, and one draw. It’s hardly relegation form, but that’s hardly the point.

Last days for Nuno.

The bulk of Spurs’ losses were rough. There was a 3-1 gubbing at the hands of Arsenal, along with 3-0 capitulations to Chelsea, Palace and Manchester United that gave Spurs the unwanted distinction of conceding the most defeats by three goals or more in the Premiership this season.

And that’s without addressing the loss to Vitesse in the third-tier Europa Conference League competition, which is basically like losing to the cast of Air Bud.

And that’s without addressing the fact that Nuno was Spurs’ 45th choice for manager this summer.

And that’s without acknowledging that Harry Kane was probably mailing shit in to get Nuno fired so that he could stop fighting his own midfield for possession and start living his life again (thanks to Jeanerist and United fan, Blairhog, for texting in that theory- it’s a good one).

And we haven’t really talked about the fact that Antonio Conte (ex-Juve, Chezz and Inter manager) is the new Spurs boss, and how last week it looked like he might have been United’s new boss, and apparently he couldn’t land on which mess he wanted to get into bed with the most, which is a lot like being at a bar in college, only with arguably higher stakes, and isn’t that just a bit of a mercenary profile you’ve developed for yourself there, Antonio?

You’re such a Conte.

(full credit to Jeaner co-conspirator, the Punographer, for floating this line in our Instagram a while back)

Aaron Ramsdale making save after save.

Rammers!!!

At £25 million Aaron “Rammers” Ramsdale was a controversial buy in goals for Arsenal before the season started. In successive seasons he’d been relegated with Bournemouth and Sheffield United, while also being named to the England Euro 2020 squad. Bit of a mixed bag, there.

There was a sense that he wasn’t good enough, even with that nickname doing a ton of heavy lifting.

But good god he’s proven himself to be rather capable this year. A shit hot performance against Leicester City on Saturday was his latest contribution twixt the sticks for the Arse. Did you see his save on that James Maddison free kick? Holy moly.

Go on, Rammers.

Ronaldo wondergoal versus Spurs

Fucking Ronaldo’s finish

Just watch this goal and then fuck right off. Ridiculous.